This is a placeholder. It is a placeholder for my current and upcoming frustration

This quilt I am making is in one part a thank you, an offering to the mothers of Gee’s Bend.
I had taken Edwin Morgan’s words from ‘A Little Catechism from the Demon’ and created a text
that made the existential frustration of the poem and the absurdity of asking questions only to
receive more riddles in return more overt and haptic imposing into one’s personal space
through the seemingly tactile banality of textiles and the intimacy of embroidery. This constant
flux between frustration, absurdity, and the anxiety all around it has been here with me in the
making of the quilt and its embroidery of my created text.

Imposter Syndrome. Quilt Math. All Caps Specters.

I have been channeling this flux into the quilt and documenting it as ‘affect in process’
something I have been doing this entire time but never took a moment to acknowledge and
accept it as an important part of creating, something that can give meaning when meaning
eludes me. I had been working through frustration and absurdity before this quilt. Life is quilt
math. I have always been dyscalculic, but I know that my frustration is not only mine, but mine
to do with what I please. My frustration works for me whether my frustration and I realize that
or not. I can use it because it comes from me, and I will continue to infuse it into this quilt. We
will be a team, my frustration and I, and we will carry on knowingly and disruptively frustrated

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